Day 1 - How the hell did I get here?

February 7, 2016
Day 1 Sober
Hello!  I decided to start blogging about quitting alcohol.  About trying to become Alcohol Free (AF).  How in hell did I get here????  I will start at the beginning….5 days ago….
On Saturday night, my husband (Mr. 53) and I attended a good friends 50th birthday dinner at a restaurant.  We were seated with 2 other couples whom we love dearly.  The wine bottles were on the table.  (The birthday boy is a wine lover so they were high end bottles and they kept coming!).  The birthday party was fun.  I thought I drank the same as everyone else at my table.  I was feeling good and happy!  We got home around midnight, Mr. 53 went to bed, and what did I do?  I cracked open another bottle of red and drank half of it.  Stayed up until about 2 am.  Slept in on Sunday..woke up at 11:00 and told Mr. 53 that I was really sick…I thought I caught the flu or something.  He informed me that I was indeed suffering a hangover!  While I had 9 hours of "sleep," I don't think it was "real sleep."  I felt HORRIBLE all day long!  That night was a party being thrown by a dear friend, who is a drinking compadre.  I HAD to go to her party…she probably even ordered extra bottles of red just for me!  So, we went…me, Mr. 53, Son #2 and Daughter #3.  Son #1 is away at college.  Well guess what?  For the first time in YEARS, I couldn't drink…I have NEVER felt like that!  Everyone kept telling me to have one…the hair of the dog…it would take away the hangover.  I did consider it, but didn't imbibe... that is how tired I felt.  I drank a lot of seltzer water.

I had planned on giving up wine for Lent…which was in 4 days.  In years past I have also given up wine, only to find myself switching my drink to cosmos!  But, the real reason I wanted to give up the drink is because I cannot lose any weight!!!  I am not giant…but am on my way.  I drink a bottle and sometimes more EVERY SINGLE NIGHT….come the weekend….MORE!  And it is any wonder why I can't lose any weight?  I want my old body back….20 lbs ago!  I have a HUGE wine belly.  It makes me sick to look at it.  It physically appalls me to look at it because I know it's ALL RED WINE!  So, I had googled "quitting alcohol and weight loss" and it led me to this article:

https://manvfat.com/stopping-alcohol-weight-loss-transformation-julian-kirkman-page-amazingloser/

For some strange reason, this article resonated with me.  I can't tell you why.  First off, the subject of the article is male..I am female.  He lives across the pond, I live in the US, he drank WAY more than me.  But…he LOST WEIGHT without even trying!  I wanted that for myself!  I was actually jealous that he upped and quit drinking just like that!  And lost weight doing so! I wanted to be Julian Kirkman Page!

So, in the end, a bad hangover and a gentleman across the pond were my catalyst!  (Not to mention the MAJOR self-loathing I experienced each and every day!)

Hope you find your catalyst!
Love,
Sober at 53