February 12, 2016
Day 6
Hello!
Today is my first Friday! How the heck am I going to get thru the night without my wine? Friday night was always a time of relaxation. A long week had ended and now the weekend was approaching. Time to relax and celebrate that….with a bottle of wine (or two or three!). This was going to be tough! After all, Mr. 53 doesn't have my drinking issues so he is free to imbibe! I knew I shouldn't hang at home. Daughter #3 has an activity on Fridays that ends at 6:30. On Fridays, I spent the entire time at said activity waiting to get home and pop the cork on a bottle of red. What was I going to do? I thought about the book that I had read, "I DON'T DRINK" and in it, the author said that at night he decided to swim in place of staying home and drinking. Well, I do not have the luxury of finding another activity that lets me go out of the house on a nightly basis. Have I mentioned that Daughter #3 has special needs? (that will be another post coming soon!). So,with that in mind, I stopped at the local Barnes & Noble (as well as COSTCO and a pharmacy…anything not to go home and be tempted!) and purchased my next book club book, and some adult coloring books and markers, as well as a new calendar so I could mark off my days AF. I thought that the adult coloring books would be my "activity." OK…so now I can go home. I have a plan..I am going to order in a good dinner and watch TV and color! EPIC FAIL! I get home, and Mr. 53 is cooking dinner. We NEVER cook on a Friday night. Also, it is a sub par dinner! Mr. 53 was trying to get rid of what's in the fridge! So, that turned me into a beast! My good dinner went out the window with my wine! I turned into a crabby woman…the kind that I don't want to be around! Needless to say, I didn't color. I went up to my bedroom and tried to find something to watch on TV. I couldn't find anything and was so bored and crabby. It took EVERYTHING I had not to drink. I finally went to bed….after offering up many apologies to Mr. 53 and to Daughter #3!
But the good news is….I woke up with NO SELF LOATHING! And in addition…PURE JOY! I had made it thru my first Friday night! Go me! Now…how in the world am I going to make it through Saturday night?????
Wishing you an easy day of "firsts!"
Love,
Sober at 53
It's Friday night for me and I'm going to go through exactly what you wrote here. And I'm also 53! I've been trying to quit drinking since November of last year, still not there yet! Reading your blog (and many others) is helping me to turn the tide. Great to know you've made it over 100 days. When you wrote this, you had no clue you'd be where you at now. Be proud of yourself.
ReplyDeleteHi Lia! You will get there too! I don't envy you your first Friday night!!! That was the absolute hardest night for me. It makes my stomach turn when I think about it! I hope you are doing well! Let me know how it goes for you!!! xo
ReplyDeleteI am enjoying reading your early days. I stopped drinking for four months - went to a wedding and just started again. I thought I could drink on one day and just stop - so wrong! I am a Sauvignon blanc drinker and I am just like you were. I will drink moderately with friends then buy another 1 or 2 bottles on the way home and continue. I live with a constant hangover and today is my new day one. I started blogging a couple of weeks ago but I failed and the self loathing returned, which meant I just drank even more! I am going to read your journey as I go through mine. Thanks for blogging - oh and I am 50! X
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